Monthly Archives: January 2012

Your apocalypse playlist

Between us we have contributed a number of great tunes for the apocalypse, they are all available through the themed fun page but here is your apocalypse playlist so far so you can download the tunes and get ready for the end of the world.

Battle Star Galactica Theme 1978
Silent Running by Joan Baez
Gold Guns Girls by Metric
Rejoice in the Sun by Joan Baez
The Zombie Song by Stephanie Mabey
Wasteland Soul by Miracle of Sound
Blaze of Glory by Jon Bon Jovi
Summer Glau by John Anealio
Children of the Damned by Iron Maiden
Don’t Fear the Reaper by Blue Oyster Cult
Four Minute Warning by Mark Owen
Forever Autumn by The Moody Blues/ Jeff Wayne’s The War of the Worlds
Apocalypse Please by Muse
I Don’t Want to Set the World on Fire by the Inkspots
Times like These by the Foo Fighters
Blow me Away by Breaking Benjamin
It’s the End of the World as we Know it by REM
Eighth Day by Hazel O Connor
Morning Dew by Robert Plant
The Fall by Big New Prinz
Na-Na-Na by My Chemical Romance
Eve of Destruction by Larry Underwood
We Will all go Together when we Go by Tom Lehrer
We’re not Going to Make it by The Presidents of the USA

Music for the Apocalypse #19: The Zombie Song

Just because it’s the zombie apocalypse, doesn’t mean love is dead (although it might be a little undead…) And so, for a dose of musical fabulousness, have a listen to The Zombie Song by Stephanie Mabey.

“If I were a zombie, I’d never eat your brain…”

I blame our mighty leader Honeybadger for this one entirely as The Zombie Song was used in the closing credits of the excellent Un:Bound Video Edition: Zombies (otherwise known as what happens when Leicester is over run by zombies in the middle of an author interview…)

And it’s such a wonderfully catchy song…

“If I were a zombie, I’d never eat your brain.
I’d just want your heart, yeah I’d want your heart…”


Battleaxebunny out.

All Hail The Queen!

Apocalypse Girls of the world unite because the queen of the zompoc is almost back!

With only a few months to wait until the full movie, here, for your educational entertainment is the trailer for the next chapter in the Chronicles of Alice.

We give you – Resident Evil: Retribution…

Cocktail Cabinet of the Apocalypse #16: Angel’s Delight


Rumour has it that this one bears a disturbing resemblance to drinkable Angel Delight pudding – only boozier and creamier.

Ingredients (Serves 1)
1 Measure Hendrick’s Gin
1 Measure De Kuyper Triple Sec
1 Measure Double Cream
1 Measure Milk
0.5 Measure De Kuyper Grenadine

Method:
Shake all ingredients together well in a cocktail shaker.
Fine strain into a chilled martini glass and garnish with something that matches the very pinkness of it.

Battleaxebunny out.

(Original recipe from here)

Preparing for Disaster: The GO Bag

Preparing for a Disaster

To prepare for anything from a hurricane or an earthquake you will need a disaster kit. In your disaster kit is your Go-bag (24-72 hours), Med Kit, Extra eRats (longer than 3 days), and the Bag O’ Evil (weapons of mass protection). Put the following items together in a backpack or another easy to carry container in case you must evacuate quickly. Prepare one Go-bag for each family member and make sure each has an I.D. tag. You may not be at home when an emergency strikes so keep some additional supplies in your car and at work, considering what you would need for your immediate safety.

A “Go bag” goes by many names, Wikipedia prefers “Bug-out bag“, the military likes “Bail-out bag”, and I’ve been known to use “GTFO bag” (Get The F!@# Out). In the end, all the names serve the same purpose. Having a completely pre-placed, pre-packed bag that is ready to simply pick up and go. Hopefully, it will contain everything you need to survive on the short-term (24-72 hours), until the emergency subsides (unlikely if the undead are wandering around or an alien invasion) or until you can get to a bigger cache of supplies (find the resistance or survivors).

A normal Go-bag will contain personal information that might be used to find loved ones, identify medical needs, and possible help get you into other countries. A GTFO bag or Bug-out bag for an apocalypse is a completely different animal. It can be lightweight or heavy for more long-term surviving. It is also just a part of your ultimate survival KIT.

So today, we are going to talk about just the Go bag, GGSA style. You can modify the pack as much as you like. I just recommend looking up and researching what would be best for you.

  1. Flashlight with extra batteries
  2. MP3 player for kicking ass soundtrack
  3. Spare pair of sunglasses that make you look bad-ass
  4. Gas Mask (bio agents or poisoned air) see First Aid kit for bio-warfare counter agents.
  5. Water, at least one liter per day per person
  6. eRats- Emergency Rations, MRE’s, Backpack meals, or energy bars.

Clothing- GGSA’s tend to be fashion forward, however, in an emergency save your ass first fashion second. These are the must haves:

1. Shit kickers ( I have bejeweled Hello Kitty on the side of mine)

2. Bandana and gloves

3.Cargo pants (not jeans and with a quality leather belt)

4. Two (2) shirts (short and long for layering)

5. Kick ass sunglasses.  Think of how the Terminator must have felt , if he could feel. A good pair of kick ass looking sunglasses ramps up a persons confidence.

6. Shelter- Tent or tarp, Mylar blankets and collapsible sleeping bags.

7. First Aid Kit- will go in to more detail later

8. Slim Jim or Lock pick set. Yes I know Slim Jims are illegal, but its the end of life as we know it. Bend a little.

9. Emergency Fire starter

10. Cooking pot: small pot or large metal cup to boil water.

11. Survival knife may not be large machete but a 4-10″ knife to use for survival stuff

12. Side Arm: Pistol, gun that can kill something to eat or maim to run away from.

Now this is just a few of the items you need to have if you survive the initial wave of death and devastation.

The Ninja Turtle Threat

by battleaxebunny

The problem with Big Business accidentally losing track of all its toxic waste is that sooner or later it’s going to seep into places and mutate otherwise harmless animals into killer mutants set on taking over the world. Oh they’ll try and claim otherwise, but we know the truth. The Turtles are out to get us so it’s time to get prepared for the Turtle Apocalypse!

Natural Habitat
The enemy prefers sewers and is most known for lurking under New York. A cunning choice given that local legend suggests that it is in fact alligators who stalk the tunnels under the Big Apple. Local legend lies, or, at the very least, has been deliberately misinformed as the Turtles have killed any alligators or other vaguely predator (and, indeed, non-predator) life form to stray near their territory.

But don’t think avoiding New York will keep you safe. London has legends of feral pigs in the sewers, Paris has a crocodile, the ancient Romans had an octopus and you definitely want to be avoiding the sewers in Derry, Maine as the stories on that one are too many and varied for anyone’s sanity. Some may take this as proof that the sewers are mutating a variety of new and dangerous life forms but we know that it’s really just cover stories for a worldwide network of killer Turtles waiting for the right moment to attack.


Know Your Enemy
Despite professing to be ninjas, they are not the subtlest of creatures and can often be found brawling in the open, usually with their own pet reporter in attendance. They have been known to wield Katana, sai, nunchaku or a bō staff, which, combined with their tendency to show off means a quick draw with a gun is your best bet.

They’re not the brightest of creatures either and are highly susceptible to traps – we recommend pizza if you want to lure them out. Pizza is Turtle crack. If you’re all out of pizza then get your hands on a giant talking rat as they seem to have something of a fetish for this mutant species. Something to do with father issues from what we understand.

They are also highly effective in the use of propaganda and keep a pet reporter specifically for the task of spinning accounts of their mass-murdering exploits. They even have a recruitment song:

Ok, yes, they may have wiped out a few evil-ninjas, local criminals and alien invaders but that was just them taking out the competition as they don’t play well with others. Actually, most of the time they don’t even play well amongst themselves which gives you an extra tactical advantage if you can make your strike when they’re on one of their breaks. Go in quick, avoid any temptation to taunt them and take no prisoners.

And if you’re not scared yet, remember this: they’re also partially responsible for the Ninja Rap.

Truly they must be stopped…

Battleaxebunny out.

Cocktail Cabinet of the Apocalypse #15: Ninja Turtle


This one looks like it’s been poured from a barrel of toxic waste which is why it’s utterly perfect for the ninja turtles of the apocalypse… Probably goes well with pizza, too.

Ingredients (serves 1)
1 Measure Hendrick’s Gin
0.5 Measure De Kuyper Blue Curaçao
Top up with Orange Juice

Method:
Half fill a glass with cubed ice then build ingredients in order: De Kuyper Blue Curaçao, then Hendricks Gin and top up with orange juice.

Muddle ingredients together and garnish with a slice of (throwing) star fruit if desired.

Battleaxebunny out.

(Original recipe from here)

Keeps Grays Grayer

Let’s face it – even when the world ends, you’re going to want clean clothes. But with electricity a precious or non-existent resource the options are limited. Washboards work, sure, but they’re inefficient and heavy. Who has time to scrub when you’re hunting zombies or being chased by would-be robotic overlords?

Enter the Laundry Pod.


Built like a salad spinner on steroids, this device is durable, light, portable, and water efficient, not to mention entirely man-powered. Plus the design is simplistic enough to be duplicated with salvaged modern-day materials, making it the perfect project (and chore) to keep children occupied and contributing.

Keep Your Powder Dry,
Green Valkyrye

GGSA at Pornokitsch

The gang from The Girl’s Guide to Surviving the Apocalypse trooped by Pornokitsch to share our thoughts about why we do what we do. Drop by and say hello and see what we have to say. Among the highlights:

When Adele invited women writers and bloggers to contribute to The Girls’ Guide to the Apocalypse there were mountains of women bursting at the seams to talk about this stuff, not because women are suddenly going apocalypse crazy, but because there have always been women who were interested in this stuff who haven’t been given the same platforms to talk about it that men have. ~ Apocalypse Womble

Possibly the reason it appeals to women so much is that the end of the world is a great equaliser. ~ Cathy 

Pretty is all very well and good (we can be pretty and still kick-ass) but when it comes to genes that count towards replenishing the population, we have a lot more to contribute. ~ Foxglove



Some say the world will end in fire, some say in ice.* And that’s before you get to the aliens, zombies, dragons and mad fairies. We don’t know quite what’s going to do it, but one thing’s for sure — it’ll be interesting finding out. ~ Battleaxebunny


It is interesting to explore the changing dynamics within a family during the apocalypse. Parents, used to being firmly in control, may not be able to cope when everything they know collapses, while children may be required to take on more adult roles. ~ Geri

Music for the Apocalypse #18: Wasteland Soul by MiracleofSound

Fallout, the epitome of games to do with the Apocalypse. A game where you wonder the wasteland, doing good or evil deeds as you see fit. (And really the game deserves a post all of its own.) So here is a song written about the game. The video contains shots from the game, and it all makes it feel very romantic. In fact I think I might go back to a’wondering and saving the wasteland from those pesky fiends. Do Enjoy.

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