Oh, you knew it was just a matter of time! Looky there, Avenger and Bond Girl (and overdue for GGSA Idol status) Honor Blackman stars with stalwart Richard Briers and the legendary Alan Ford — and a bunch of young folks — in the latest zombie apocalypse with a twist and a few guffaws. You can bet the Apocalypse Gals will be there!
Cockneys v Zombies: the trailer (h/t to Lochee for the heads up!)
A felt-based illustration of the experience of the modern zombie.
And so we see that Destroying Humanity is best accomplished, and more fun, when done with friends.
The main purpose of First Aid is to keep an injured person stable until the Emergency Medical Services arrive. Of course in the event of apocalypse they might not be available.
In a First Aid situation you should always get help straight away.
If you have a doctor or medic in your team refer to them. If there aren’t any professionals available make sure you have back up, you shouldn’t deal with this on your own.
It is worth having some First Aid knowledge yourself so you can help out injured teammates and keep yourself from danger.
Whenever you are dealing with an unconscious person remember DRAB.
Danger – Always check if it’s safe to approach. This is especially important during the apocalypse.
If you are dealing with a zompoc your first instinct on seeing an unconscious body should be Double Tap. Remove the head or destroy the brain.
Response – If it is safe to approach see if you can get a response from them. Try talking, shouting, prodding them with something, shaking, light pinching, or your most hilarious joke. If you get no response they are probably unconscious, but be careful it could be a trap.
If they do respond then they are (hopefully) conscious, so something else is probably wrong and hopefully they can tell you what that is.
If they say “Braaains” RUN!
If they are unconscious:
Airway – The airway needs to be as wide as possible to make breathing easier. To extend the airway put a hand on the forehead and use two fingers on the chin to tilt the head right back. This is very important and can help them to breathe again without further action on your part.
Here’s a quick demonstration you can try right now:
- Put your chin as close to your chest as possible and take a deep breath.
- Now tilt your head back as far as you can and take another deep breath.
Feel that? That difference is absolutely vital when you can’t move your head and all your muscles are completely relaxed.
Breathing – Check if they are breathing. If you are comfortable doing so put your cheek above their nose and mouth to see if you can feel breath. Look along the body to see if the chest is rising and falling. Do this for no more than 10 seconds.
First Aiders are no longer advised to check for a pulse.
It’s hard to find one if you don’t know how, you can waste time doing it, and you might find your own blood is thundering in your ears too much to find one, especially if it’s weak.
If they are breathing normally put them in the recovery position (see below).
If they aren’t breathing start chest compressions. Here is hard man Vinnie Jones to tell us how.
If you are comfortable doing so you can perform mouth-to-mouth (this is an excellent way of spreading disease, so don’t do it if you aren’t comfortable). Only ever perform mouth-to-mouth on someone who isn’t breathing.
- Make sure the airway is fully extended, otherwise the air won’t go where it’s needed.
- Pinch the nostrils closed.
- Cover their mouth with yours and blow into their mouth steadily.
- Lift your head to breathe in and check if the chest rises (if it does you got it right, well done you).
Each breath should take 1 second.
Do 2 of these rescue breaths after every 30 compressions.
If you aren’t sure whether you’re doing it right just do the compressions.
It’s worth mentioning that CPR is only a stop gap measure until the professionals arrive. It’s a way of pumping oxygenated blood to the brain while the body can’t do it properly. You aren’t supposed to do it for more than 10 minutes. If help isn’t coming, and the casualty isn’t breathing, stop before you exhaust yourself.
If a casualty is breathing but unconscious put them in to the recovery position.
There have been various different ways of doing the recovery position, but the most important things are:
- The casualty is resting stably on their side and can’t roll onto their back.
- The airway is extended.
- The head is supported
- The mouth is pointing down.
This is important because any vomit (or other unwanted fluid) should end up outside the body, not sitting in the throat blocking the precious, precious oxygen.
One of the keys things about unconscious people is that they don’t move of their own accord, so you can move them into different positions. One of the other key things is that they have no muscle responses and they are completely floppy, so you will have to do all of the moving for them.
Once someone is in the recovery position you can let go of them and even leave them. Though if there are carnivores around that might not be a good idea.
Here is a lady from the British Red Cross demonstrating what to do.
Remember in an apocalypse situation everyone will be more disheveled and dirty, and something will probably be on fire in the background.
I am not a medical professional, simply a well-informed amateur with a background in lifeguarding.
Government officials of Canada’s west coast are launching a campaign to encourage tourists and residents alike to prepare for a possible zombie apocalypse. Do they know something we don’t?
For some of their survival tips check out their website here but remember, a true Apocalypse Girl is always ready!
Dana Fredsti’s Plague Town Pandemic Tour
Apocalypse Girls team up with Dana Fredsti for the Plague Town Pandemic Tour!
A lethal zombie virus will be infecting websites, blogs, forums and social
media accounts across the globe from April 16th to celebrate the publication
of the first novel in an action-packed new urban fantasy zombie series by
To win a signed copy of Plague Town and the unprecedented chance to have a
character named after you in the next novel in the series, Plague Nation,
follow the spread of this virtual zombie pandemic by searching for a code
hidden across nine articles, interviews and excerpts hosted by a selection of
the top fantasy, horror and books sites in UK & US!
A word is hidden in CAPS in each article; collect all nine and tweet the
sentence you’ve discovered to @TitanBooks and @DanaFredsti with #PlagueTown
before April 23rd. The winner will be selected at random from the tweeters!
Please check back on APOCALYPSE GIRLS on the 19th April to read a Q&A with Dana Fredsti and for the chance to have a zombie named after you!
Scientists predict that the outbreak will have reached the following
international locations by the dates below:
We Love This Book
Good Girls Gone Geek
The Daily Dead
We Love This Book
Dana Fredsti and Titan Books
by Apocalypse Womble
After I saw Batman Begins I decided that I needed to become a ninja, just like Batman. And it worked. I worked out and lost weight and got fit – the fittest I have been in my life. I still didn’t know shit about martial arts, but every time I looked at crisps or considered flaking on my run, I asked myself: ‘What would the ninja do?’ and it got me motivated.
For a bit. These things go in cycles. I got overconfident and lazy. I thought I could eat ALL the crisps, because I was fit like a ninja, and working out became so easy I somehow got to thinking I didn’t need to do it so much. So after keeping trim for a couple of years, I got fat again – fatter than I had been before I wanted to be a ninja. I noticed that my scores on the various zombie survival tests that float around the Internet were dropping. I realised that if the zombie apocalypse were to happen tomorrow I was no longer sure I would survive. Running at speed and maintaining stamina long-distance is a vital skill in the zompocalypse situation.
Briefly, I was motivated again. I was running to out-distance the zombies. O’course, I then discovered that my crappy joints had words to say about all this running, and I had to stop, but the essence of the idea was sound. You see, exercising is boring, and the targets of getting thin or being fit can seem ephemeral and theoretical in a world where what you want to be is fit and slim right now, and in fact being fit and slim requires consistent work over months or even years. On its own, your true motivation is rarely enough to keep you fit. You need another motivation – something that can make the boring work of exercise seem fun and worthwhile right now.
I liked pretending I was training to be a ninja. I liked running to get fit in case of zombie apocalypse, but the awesome people at Zombies, Run have gone one better. They have made jogging a game, a game in which you are outrunning zombies. And not only that, but you’re fighting to find the materials your base needs to survive, and you’re slowly uncovering a story – about what’s happened, about what the human race needs to do to survive. I’ll let the awesome makers of the game explain.
I heard about this months ago when the kickstarted for the project was launched. It’s had all the success it deserves. On Monday, 27th February it goes live, and I can’t think of any better way for a girl who cares about her survival to prepare for the apocalypse.
- Apocalypse Womble out
The gang from The Girl’s Guide to Surviving the Apocalypse trooped by Pornokitsch to share our thoughts about why we do what we do. Drop by and say hello and see what we have to say. Among the highlights:
When Adele invited women writers and bloggers to contribute to The Girls’ Guide to the Apocalypse there were mountains of women bursting at the seams to talk about this stuff, not because women are suddenly going apocalypse crazy, but because there have always been women who were interested in this stuff who haven’t been given the same platforms to talk about it that men have. ~ Apocalypse Womble
Possibly the reason it appeals to women so much is that the end of the world is a great equaliser. ~ Cathy
Pretty is all very well and good (we can be pretty and still kick-ass) but when it comes to genes that count towards replenishing the population, we have a lot more to contribute. ~ Foxglove
Some say the world will end in fire, some say in ice.* And that’s before you get to the aliens, zombies, dragons and mad fairies. We don’t know quite what’s going to do it, but one thing’s for sure — it’ll be interesting finding out. ~ Battleaxebunny
It is interesting to explore the changing dynamics within a family during the apocalypse. Parents, used to being firmly in control, may not be able to cope when everything they know collapses, while children may be required to take on more adult roles. ~ Geri
I ordered myself a couple of necklaces to go with my apocalypse girl wardrobe this year and I have to share this one.
In a twist on ‘Ask the Experts’ I thought i’d include this part dramatic and part instructional video with advice on the zompoc from Dave Moody, Wayne Simmons and Jasper Bark. Also featuring as heroine, my own Girl Friday Kat Heubeck.