Things my mum taught me

by GClarkHellery

A somewhat belated shout out to the mums! Hope you all had a fabulous Mothers Day and were treated like the true Apocalypse Girls you are. Mums are great, they are always prepared for anything, be it a tissue to wipe away snot, treats when you need them most and a hug when it all goes a little wrong. They also pass on their skills and knowledge to the next generation of Apocalypse Girls, giving us the ability to truly kick the ass of anything that gets in our way.

In thinking about this post, I wondered what skills my mum had passed on to me which would help me survive in an apocalypse situation. I suppose most people, when asked the question what has your mum taught you might say cooking. Now, I’ll let you into a well-known secret – my Mum can’t cook. She’s been known to burn toast to such an extent, even the birds in mid-winter won’t touch it. However, my mother-in-law (aka Mum 2) is an excellent cook with skills to rival Delia. So while my Mum instilled me with a sense of adventure with my cooking (when you’ve burned two thirds of dinner and have guests waiting, you get creative with what you serve) Mum 2 has given me the knowledge of herbs and spices and how these can save any meal.

Of all the skills you might need during and after the apocalypse, cooking will be essential: the ability to get creative in the kitchen while knowing what herbs will truly bring out the flavour of a genetically deformed chicken will literally be the determining factors between life and death.

So a big thanks Mum and Mum 2 and all the mums for being amazing Apocalypse Girls.

What skills or knowledge has your mum passed on to you that you can use in an apocalypse situation? Let us know below.

3 Responses to Things my mum taught me

  • Things my Mum taught me (that I don’t always remember to do):

    1. Always have a tissue handy.
    2. Never shut your handbag in the boot.
    3. Take immodium, paracetamol and gaviscon on holiday.
    4. Tidy as you go.
    5. Appreciate what you’ve got.

  • Jenny Barber says:

    My mum also can’t cook. And she hates housework. And shopping. And anything vaguely domestic. So everyone in our house (including my dad) learnt early how to sort things out for ourselves. (I think this may have been her cunning plan!) Apocalypse-wise, this means I’m adept at making food that uses tins of stuff and pasta so lack of fresh food in the apoc won’t be a problem. 🙂

    Tidy as you go is one of hers as well, although it’s part of her wider philosophy of doing a little bit of whatever every day rather than putting it off and having to deal with things in a big chunk. Which as ideologies go, would definitely come in handy for killing zombies as you could do your daily ten extermination and then swan off for cocktails with the girls on the roof of the mall…

    She also taught us that nothing is impossible and that we should try everything. This has led to a rash of short-lived businesses and hobbies which may have stumbled but were definitely fun to do, giving a broader range of skills and creative approach to doing things. She’s still at it, too. The other day I mentioned that of all the kiddie activities we’d done, there hadn’t been any martial arts, and she picked me up a kung fu leaflet from the local leaisure centre. Needless to say, she thinks the Apocalypse Girls are cool!

    Her main one, though, is you should do what makes you happy. Life’s too short to stay stuck doing things that depress you so don’t be afraid to walk away and try something new. Handy if you post-apoc base is overrun as it makes it easy to abandon and find someone better. Plus happy people during the apocalypse will live longer. 🙂

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